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Half a year following its introduction, a digital platform aimed at encouraging young men to think critically about their sexual conduct has found significant engagement, providing a constructive alternative to the often toxic environment of the manosphere.
Drew Davis, who serves as director of strategic initiatives at SafeBae, a US-based sexual violence prevention charity, was deeply disturbed by the content he encountered on Reddit. He observed numerous posts from young men grappling with feelings of confusion and guilt, expressing concerns such as “I think I did something wrong,” or “I might have sexually assaulted someone – I don’t know what to do next.” What troubled him further were the responses these posts attracted: accusatory and harmful comments like “You’re evil” or “You should kill yourself,” alongside replies that dismissed concerns and encouraged joining insular, often misogynistic groups. Davis recounted, “Given the rising popularity of the manosphere and those online communities, I knew we had to do something rather quickly.”
In response to this troubling climate, SafeBae launched Vibe Check, a no-cost digital resource designed as an alternative to the damaging advice prevalent in anonymous forums or generated by AI chatbots, which can sometimes reinforce harmful behaviors. Unlike AI-driven tools, Vibe Check utilizes a structured “decision tree” model that takes users through various scenarios where consent may have been violated. The platform incorporates cognitive behavioural therapy exercises that promote reflection on one’s actions, with educational content centered around understanding boundaries and the importance of making sincere apologies.
While most existing sexual violence resources primarily focus on survivors, Vibe Check addresses individuals who may have crossed lines themselves, guiding them toward accountability and responsibility. Drawing from over ten years of experience working with young people and insights gained from online discussions, the SafeBae team developed the tool to help users acknowledge unintentional harm and steer them away from the hostile spaces of the manosphere. Davis pointed out the broader social context, noting, “We’re in this era of seeing powerful men like [Jeffrey] Epstein never face accountability. I think people project some of their frustration on to young men and want to hold them accountable in a way that’s disproportionate.” He believes the platform offers a measured approach: encouraging young people to accept responsibility and seek to make amends when harm has been caused unintentionally.
Since its launch in April, Vibe Check has been accessed by over 60,000 users, with a particularly strong following in the UK besides its US base. Feedback has been highly positive, especially in helping young men develop the skills needed to admit wrongdoing, apologise sincerely, or prepare for possible disciplinary actions. This, according to Davis, in turn helps make those processes less adversarial and less damaging for survivors. Looking ahead, SafeBae intends to adapt the framework to assist young people experiencing sextortion, a situation often accompanied by feelings of guilt and fear of punishment. Ultimately, Davis hopes Vibe Check fills a vital space between harsh condemnation and total denial, offering young men an opportunity to take ownership of their actions before harmful influences elsewhere online take hold
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